waking up...

I am not even sure how to begin detailing why I come around to this subject, other than I think I am hitting that perceived low period where it seems that my pilot is in the sky right now and I have that empty pain of silent normalcy, where things cycle naturally to that *low* and we are waiting for things to happen, possibly need for them to happen so that we can pick up with our hectic life as we left it moments ago—the inspired ones.

I was thinking about people, relationships, love, (as if you did not get that drift by now… ha ha), thinking about different communication styles, expression of need and love, and I found myself

…waking up: to the notion that not all things are as we perceive.

So, what the hell is that all about, eh? Our needs are different from others by design, otherwise if we were all the same life would not be nearly as interesting. And what we need to give is different as well. Sometimes I wonder if people do not connect as they should, or deserve, because we are so wrapped up in our own communication style that we tend to forget that there is someone else on the other end of the line.

Take for instance, should you be the one that likes to express your feelings—whether they be positive, regressive, beautiful, loving or from a place of hurt—and you share them with another, we tend to forget that the receiving end is not like us. That is the beauty of relationships (no matter what type they are). We should give for the art and health of giving, never to expect to receive the way we give.

On the flip: when the person on the other end receives, they may not understand what we are giving in the first place for we are not speaking their language. And then we perceive them as not giving back. Or, we do, or rather they understand and appreciate our gift, yet do not modify their communication style (or clear up the *rules* for a lack of a better term) so that both equally move forward in a symbiotic fashion.

Or, is the trick to effective communication is to take a lesson from a masters course in communication—stakeholder engagement? When taking a stakeholder perspective, the idea is that you communicate to others they way they would communicate to themselves. That is the trick in moving things forward—do unto others NOT as they would do to you, but rather do unto others the way that they would do unto themselves.

Give a whirl, put on the other person’s shoes when giving back. Speak their language, both in words and actions—reciprocate. It could very well make all the difference in the world.

question: how do you do unto yourself?