so badly...

I was outside early this morning, having my cup o’ joe before the rat-race-put-on-the-war-paint folly of every weekday morning was to commence. And for some reason, I started thinking about my accountant back home in Tampa and the wise words he offered me when I was looking into buying an existing business. The numbers looked good, I was very eager to move forward, yet he gently said that if I want it

…so badly: yet am able at the same time to walk away,

then it is the right decision to go forward. Interesting thoughts for a Wednesday morning.

So I reflected on those words of April 1999, from a medium sized, head shaved bean counter with a warm smile and hearty laugh and wondered how is it applicable, as well as its nature— to walk away from something worth fighting for, in particular.

Rather, when is it applicable, or is it to everything-- things and to human beings? And what is it designed to protect us from, that inner peace of *yes I want this so badly yet can walk away*?

For example, someone who you love so deeply that you perceive is not reciprocating, or even a new job to which you have applied… people and things that we want and need badly. Why need the peace of knowing that at the same time you can walk away? It could very well be that if we are able to walk away, it means we are healthy and whole, and are not using to which we are drawn as a potential crutch… enabling areas where we need to develop to that our growth is stunted. Or we are too scared to grow…

On the flip-- what about people that honestly do need us most? (things do not need us, c’mon, that BMW does not HAVE to have you driving it) That could very well be the differentiating factor, and may be where the *walk away* clause is not applicable. The women and children in Darfur need us, and some want to help so badly that the inner peace is achieved by contributing, and not by walking away, the willingness to give to make a better world. Or a democracy that needs a swift kick in the ass, you just have to buy an airline ticket and fly across the world to contribute? (that would be me!)

Yet you could meet someone who needs you so much that walking away may be the thing to do… for now, or maybe not at all? This is where it gets tough, to me, for it is in our nature to be needed and loved, as well as to need and love another.

Hence, walking away from people is not an option, especially if it is not negotiated, regardless if it someone who we need or another who needs us—whatever the nature of the need. Maybe this sage advice from my accountant should remain with *things* that we perceivably love and need. Then again, some may not grow in our presence and hence the walk is healthy too...

The bottom line is, when faced with a passion for a thing or a person, we may need to create a little space to not only clear our heads and resolve that it is the right decision, but to allow ourselves to trust the process. To do this, especially when it comes to people we love and need, it takes reciprocal, insightful, honest and reflexive communication of both people to transcend the crutch factor and continue the journey of development, no matter who they are in our life. And as for that walking away bit? Well, that too should be decided upon and negotiated in the reflexive, loving and open communication-- for sometimes we need to walk away to let the other person grow, just as much as we need to walk towards another to become an even better being-- for the reciprocity between two amazing beings would bring energy into this world .

(this is a toughie, isn’t it?) Definitely a brain warper of a subject, nothing is the right answer, and warrants a chat so comment away!

As for that BMW you have been contemplating…

question: when would you choose to walk?